It’s probably not a good idea that I’m writing right now because I’m sleep deprived and annoyed.
It’s my 29th birthday. I was awoken by my husband who was tossing and turning in bed at 4:00a because he’s sick. It’s some sort of full body ache, waves of nausea, cold all the time thing.
I heard a chirp come from Luke’s room and my blood ran cold.
Please don’t be waking up. You slept in until 7:30a yesterday. Do that again. It’s my birthday, give me the gift of sleep.
And sure enough, the pacifier battle ensued from 4:15-5:00a. I resolved that he was likely not going to fall back asleep for good so I headed downstairs to make his bottle.
As I walked past David’s door I heard him rolling around and talking to himself in there. At 5:00a. He normally sleeps until about 6:30a.
Why does everyone besides Justin and I hate sleep right now?!
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I muttered to myself, and made my way downstairs.
By that time Luke had gotten ahold of the pacifier and was at least acting asleep so I, of course, let him be.
I decided to run the iced coffee I made last night through the cheesecloth/strainer so I could make myself a cup later today when the temperatures hit 95 degrees. And when I say “later today” I mean at about 7:25a because I will have been up for a good 3 hours.
Well that was pretty much an enormous chore and I make the executive decision to just buy iced coffee drinks pre-made for crying out loud why are there coffee grinds everywhere.
Then I sat down to my bowl of cereal and warm cup of coffee and start to set my expectations for the day. Justin and I were going to go out tonight but I’m fairly certain that won’t happen. Luke and David may have weird days and naps based on their wakeup ambush this morning. But they also may not because predicting what to expect from your kids is like predicting the right lottery numbers. It’s impossible.
And then I decided to write this blog post because I know there are other mom’s out there who have had a less than ideal start to their birthday. Or just any day for that matter. Some mornings are easy and some mornings take great feats of emotional strength (at least for me) to not be annoyed to my core that it started before I wanted it to.
And I’m working on that. I’m continually working on being more flexible with my expectations, my plans, my day to day life. I don’t think that will be a trait that I’ll ever be able to fully embrace without making a conscious choice to do so. And that’s just a personal struggle of mine. And nothing shines a bright light on my selfishness or my controlling tendencies than children.
But you know what? It’s fine that they boys had brief wake up’s this morning (they are both currently sleeping again). It’s fine! And you know what else? They both fell back asleep! And that is something to be celebrated!
So maybe it’s a good start to my birthday after all. Maybe the wake up call at 4:00a was for me to have some time to myself downstairs while the boys slept again. And maybe it was for me to think a little bit about what I want this year to look like. And, like I declared at the beginning of the year, I want it to be centered around flexibility and what really matters.
So raise your coffee cup, will you? Cheers to 29.