Sleep Deprivation and Reality are My Birthday Gifts

06
26

It’s probably not a good idea that I’m writing right now because I’m sleep deprived and annoyed.

It’s my 29th birthday. I was awoken by my husband who was tossing and turning in bed at 4:00a because he’s sick. It’s some sort of full body ache, waves of nausea, cold all the time thing.

I heard a chirp come from Luke’s room and my blood ran cold.

Please don’t be waking up. You slept in until 7:30a yesterday. Do that again. It’s my birthday, give me the gift of sleep.

And sure enough, the pacifier battle ensued from 4:15-5:00a. I resolved that he was likely not going to fall back asleep for good so I headed downstairs to make his bottle.

As I walked past David’s door I heard him rolling around and talking to himself in there. At 5:00a. He normally sleeps until about 6:30a.

Why does everyone besides Justin and I hate sleep right now?!

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I muttered to myself, and made my way downstairs.

By that time Luke had gotten ahold of the pacifier and was at least acting asleep so I, of course, let him be.

I decided to run the iced coffee I made last night through the cheesecloth/strainer so I could make myself a cup later today when the temperatures hit 95 degrees. And when I say “later today” I mean at about 7:25a because I will have been up for a good 3 hours.

Well that was pretty much an enormous chore and I make the executive decision to just buy iced coffee drinks pre-made for crying out loud why are there coffee grinds everywhere.

Then I sat down to my bowl of cereal and warm cup of coffee and start to set my expectations for the day. Justin and I were going to go out tonight but I’m fairly certain that won’t happen. Luke and David may have weird days and naps based on their wakeup ambush this morning. But they also may not because predicting what to expect from your kids is like predicting the right lottery numbers. It’s impossible.

And then I decided to write this blog post because I know there are other mom’s out there who have had a less than ideal start to their birthday. Or just any day for that matter. Some mornings are easy and some mornings take great feats of emotional strength (at least for me) to not be annoyed to my core that it started before I wanted it to.

And I’m working on that. I’m continually working on being more flexible with my expectations, my plans, my day to day life. I don’t think that will be a trait that I’ll ever be able to fully embrace without making a conscious choice to do so. And that’s just a personal struggle of mine. And nothing shines a bright light on my selfishness or my controlling tendencies than children.

But you know what? It’s fine that they boys had brief wake up’s this morning (they are both currently sleeping again). It’s fine! And you know what else? They both fell back asleep! And that is something to be celebrated!

So maybe it’s a good start to my birthday after all. Maybe the wake up call at 4:00a was for me to have some time to myself downstairs while the boys slept again. And maybe it was for me to think a little bit about what I want this year to look like. And, like I declared at the beginning of the year, I want it to be centered around flexibility and what really matters.

So raise your coffee cup, will you? Cheers to 29.

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Comments (251)

  1. Stacey Thomas says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! I’m right here with you Kate. I’ve been up since 3am. I’m annoyed because today was supposed to be a day off for me (daughter goes to daycare with dad as he goes to work, while I take a day of vacation). However she had other plans (antibiotic side effect ) and as a result, has to stay home today. I’m trying to embrace the fact that I get a day off with her, but it’s hard because my selfishness wanted a day to myself. Oh well. I’ll make the best of it!

  2. Kerrie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I wasn’t up at 4 but I did see 5:15. I just read this post and nearly cried because my pregnant body is tired and emotional. I just wanted to get another hour of sleep before my 4 year old rises, but this baby in my belly just wasn’t in the mood for sleep. Happy Birthday Kate, and thank you for making me feel like I’m not alone this morning.

  3. Maria says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! You are certainly not alone in these struggles! Hope it ends up being a great day!

  4. Rachel Williams says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I struggle with the same things ! I have a son Who is 18 months ! I have always enjoyed following your blog and it’s true inspirational posts that uplift and also teach !! From hair to life of a mom you connect with the readers because I believe we all struggle with mostly the same things I too have been awake for a while for me the worst is when everyone is sleeping and for the life of me I’m the only one awake! It’s your day Happy Birthday!!!! 29 and beautiful!

  5. Erin says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!
    I had a rough night with my 3 month old and I dread the day ahead. You are right that we need to roll with it and be creative and enjoy the little moments. But it’s also allowed to suck sometimes too! Hope your day is a beautiful one.

  6. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! I’m sorry it didn’t get off the a great start but I hope it gets better!

    http://en.emoi-emoi.com/

  7. Posted June 26, 2015

    I’ve been up since 4:30. I understand your feelings, but without the pint-sized, cuddly reasons for it.

    Happy Birthday!

  8. Posted June 26, 2015

    Hi Kate,
    Embrace every moment as you’ll blink and the boys will be grown and you’ll yearn for the days when they could cuddle on your lap and you could bury your nose into their neck for that wonderful “baby”smell.
    My daughter is now 31 and we are blessed to be such good friends..but there is a little part of me that wishes I could get one “baby” day back!
    You are an inspiration ~ even when you have struggles, you remain optimistic.
    Wishing you a wonderful birthday Kate and a year filled with love, laughter and special moments.
    Sue

  9. Kerry Markwick says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! It’s my birthday too. I turn 45 today. Cheers 🙂

  10. Lindsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    happy birthday! I’m turning 29 on Wednesday! I also had a early start with my little one. She’s just over two weeks old, so I should expect it 🙂 hope you have a good day!

  11. Kim says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday and thanks for keeping it real! I don’t have any child advice for you as I am often battling the same battle myself. But I do have a coffee suggestion: French press. They sell inexpensive ones everywhere and it makes the whole cold brew thing SO MUCH EASIER! I also like the suggestions for cold brew found on the blog Gimmie Some Oven. Don’t give up on the cold brew! So worth it! Hope your day turns around! Happy Birthday!

    • KC says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Second the French press, make some at night before bed, plunge it in the morning and drink! Or moka pot poured over ice, then add water and/or milk.

    • Andrea says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      I was just going to throw out the idea of using the French press!!! I have also had good luck with a really fine mesh strainer ingot at Walmart. It leaves a little sludge in the bottom, but that happens with my French press too.

    • Faith says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      French Press, great idea. I do it all the time. Happy Birthday!!

  12. Kathleen says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    From one “tired of the paci game” mama to another, I have to say that Wubbanubs have saved my sanity! They’re a lightweight stuffed animal attached to a paci. It gives the baby something to hold onto and use to reposition the paci when it starts to fall out. Not a 100 percent fix, but I now put a paci back in my 3 month old’s mouth much less frequently.
    Happy birthday!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Just bought one 🙂 Thanks for the tip!

      • Hannah says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Oh yeah, we lovvvve our wubbanub! It’s so cute and my 7-month-old can find it herself in the middle of the night.

    • Kristin says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      We also loved the “ball pit ‘o pacis” method I read about somewhere. Basically, we put about a dozen pacifiers in my daughters crib, scattered throughout. That way, if she woke up she could pretty much always stumble on one while still half-asleep and thus get herself back to sleep.

      Happy birthday! I certainly empathize with not-as-planned mama birthday. My husband had to go on an unavoidable business trip a week after my daughter was born, and he returned on my birthday. He had assured me he’d plan something special, but he got back at about 5pm after a day of travel and had (understandably, between the travel and the newborn life) hadn’t done anything. Between that and the sleep deprivation and the baby blues and general overwhelmed feeling it was far from my best birthday. But I eventually got cake and someone else in the family held my daughter long enough for me to eat it. 🙂

  13. Kirsten says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! We are two days apart! My birthday is on Sunday. It’s 4am here in CA and my 3.5 month old woke at 3:45 to nurse when yesterday he slept til 7:30. I had the same mindset, “it’s only 4am! You slept til 7:30 yesterday!!” Your blog post was just what I needed. I hope you have a fabulous birthday! Yay for turning 29! 🙂

  14. Erica says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Please don’t ever stop posting real and true posts like this! I needed this post after being so down on myself because I can’t get my act together and do it all! This post reminds me that I’m not alone and that I continue to work on the selfish, planned, annoyed feelings going through my head! I have a 25 month old and 4 month old. My newest thought I’ve been trying to remember is that I want my girls to know and love the Lord. That’s my primary job with them. That helps remind me that schedules and messes are secondary. Happy happy Birthday!

  15. Diana says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Bithday Kate! Nothing ever goes according to my plan either. At 6 and 9 my children are transitioning into the “5 more minutes?” stage. I love it…NOW that they’re off for summer vacation and on weekends when they get up, fix their own breakfast and hunker down on the couch with their books or a tv show… but this stage is stressful too, at least during the school year. “We missed the bus AGAIN!” was muttered way too often up until Wednesday! Nonetheless, I am thankful for those few extra minutes with them in the car as I drive them to school and for my understanding boss who, having raised 5 kids of his own, understands both that they’re only little once and that 9:30-5:30 is the new 9-5. Time goes by in a blink of an eye. Cherish those early morning wake ups and continue to love with all your heart. Independence (and sleep) comes soon enough.

  16. Nicci says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate!! I had a similar start to my 27th, and we all ended up having a fantastic day in the end. So chin up. I think birthdays can be hard for mums (its not always sunshine and roses) to power through!!

    x

  17. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! 🙂

  18. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!! I too struggle with this. I read this article yesterday and it helped me SO much. http://www.foreverymom.com/this-is-what-happens-when-satan-steals-your-motherhood/

  19. Amy Hussey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thanks for the post! I share the same struggle and it is so helpful to hear that I’m not alone! Happy birthday!

  20. Brandi major says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!!

  21. Bonnie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thank you. Thank you. I hate that your birthday is starting out crummy but I do appreciate your honesty. Real life huh? I can completely relate to your post. I’ve felt this way many times through birthdays, Valentine’s Day & just weekends in general. Vacations too! We’re headed on “vacation” next weekend with our 3 boys (6 & 2yr old twins). I’m already setting my expectations so hopefully in those moments I don’t let myself give into the anger or disappointment.

    I do hope you have a great birthday after all! Yay for 29 for the rest of your birthday celebrations!

  22. Sydney says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Here is a Happy Birthday tip (if you didn’t know this already)- Trader Joes cold brew concentrate. So good and so easy:) oh, and not messy!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      That’s what I’m talking about! Premade!!

      • Emily Givens says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Happy Birthday!!

        I just tried Chameleon Cold-Brew Concentrate this AM and it is so good. Worth a try if you can find it. 🙂
        http://www.chameleoncoldbrew.com/

        • Kerry says
          Posted June 27, 2015

          They carry Chameleon at Target!
          Grady’s is also great, available at Whole Foods: http://www.gradyscoldbrew.com/

          Happy birthday from a fellow iced coffee lover!

  23. Stephanie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Gosh I can so relate. This sounds like my birthday two weeks ago. My husband had a severe migraine and was throwing up all day and my family forgot it was even my birthday. It was the best. Really challenged me to change my expectations in the future. I hope you end up having a great birthday though, and that your friends and family make you feel especially loved <3

  24. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! I had to laugh out loud when you described your experience with homemade iced coffee. I used to make it all the time, but like you, decided it was just easier to buy the premade stuff (Starbucks iced coffee unsweetened from the grocery store is amazing with a little vanilla creamer!) If you ever do decide to make iced coffee again, try using paper towel. At least with that you don’t have to make a special trip to the store to get it 🙂

  25. Em says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy 29! Raising my mug on your birthday and wishing you all the best. I remember those early mornings well and completely get it, felt the same exact things you do. You are doing the best you can! Happy birthday! Cheers..

  26. Erin says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! For me, it always helped to hear there were other moms out there struggling with early rising kids. There was nothing worse than hearing a mom say, “Oh, that’s too bad! My little one sleeps until 8. ” 8? Never…. Our first, woke up at 4:15 am everyday for the first two years if his life. No matter when we put him to bed, he was his own alarm. He’s 4 1/2 now and sleeps until 6. I consider this a huge success. Baby number two is 13 months and gets up at 5:15. You’re not alone! Make a 6 am run to Starbucks and wait for the day they are teens that won’t get up. When all the other parents whine, you can relish in finally getting sleep.

  27. Holly says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Iced coffee is a pain to make. Lately I just make coffee in the regular ol’ coffee pot, and put it in the refrigerator for the next day. By the time I add cream and sugar, I can’t tell it’s not “cold-brewed” or whatever. Gimme dat caffeine.

  28. Chelsie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Good god… I hope this is a reality check for you to be THANKFUL you USUALLY get a full nights sleep! You realize 8 hours is not typical for having two young ones, right? Yet you complain because you get a couple hours less on your birthday?

    I have not had longer than two hours sleep at one time for over three months, and my daughter is nearly the same age as Luke. I think you need to wake up and appreciate what you do have instead of what you don’t – they’re babies, babies mean less sleep.

    • amy says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      THIS

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Man, I hope your daughter begins to sleep longer soon. I don’t dispel that Luke is typically a good sleeper, but I’m allowed to feel a certain way based on my reality, right? And I’m allowed to write about my personal experiences here, things I’m learning through them, and what is happening in my family right now. That doesn’t mean other mom’s aren’t going through tougher times, and I feel like your comment assumes that I’m proclaiming that I have it “the worst”.
      Your comment is a reminder of the double edged sword that comes with blogging. If I don’t share personal things I’m accused of only portraying an easy, curated life. And if I DO share personal things, I’m accused of complaining to the highest degree without any regard for anyone else going through anything else.
      So can I ask you to do something? Don’t add extra words or thoughts to my posts. Don’t assume a snippet of something I’m learning (flexibility when my kids wake sooner than I want them to) means I’m trying to say that I’m in the trenches over here and nothing is good or easy. It’s just a moment that a lot of other moms can relate to as well, just as many moms can relate to your 3 month old not sleeping for long chunks.

      • Deb Cadovius says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Completely with you, Kate. You’ve written what tons of us have felt over the Mommy years. Cheers to a glorious birthday!!

      • Lauraf says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Jeesh. What I think they meant to say was happy birthday? Ha
        happy birthday kate!

      • Jackie says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        God bless you for standing your ground! And for speaking your mind. And for taking advantage of the opportunity to vent your frustration even with the ever-present threat of being looked down upon for, heaven forbid, getting frustrated once in a while. No one can say that you are not grateful for those beautiful children and loving husband but life is difficult sometimes and we can commiserate with you. It’s why you write and it’s why we read. Here is to the happiest of 29th birthdays and a collective deep breath!!

      • Kristin says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Agreed! I always thinks its rude of someone to try to “one-up” someone else’s miserable day/morning/whatever.

      • Posted June 26, 2015

        Goodness..motherhood is tough on us all? There’s no competing here, or at least there shouldnt be. I love your reply and I just hope there are less people who kick you when you’re down and more that lift you up!

      • Chaile Allen says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        I’m a faithful reader of your blog but never comment because I never have anything worth saying (other than I love your content). And this post spoke volumes to me. Mainly its a message that I’m not alone in this struggle. I feel bombarded with moms who brag about their babies sleeping all night from 4 weeks old and it feels like I’m the only one who’s baby ever decides to unexpectedly wake up at 4 am! Just because others may think they have it worse than you, that doesn’t diminish the value of your struggle or my struggle or anyone else’s. Thanks for sharing!

      • Ginny says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Okay. Here is what concerns me. I have enjoyed reading this blog much in the past. Pinterest hairdos are what originally brought me here. Sheeple, aka “fan girls” don’t see the what others may. She just moved in to a half a million dollar home, gone during moving, and lives off your clicks to this site. She is so into making $$ she gets caught doing several moisturizing reviews at once, and lives off Target and IKEA through constant hash tags. You want to be real? There ya go, fan girls. You are blindly commenting. With all that said, complaining about getting up early seems a tad unreal. Am I jealous much? No, no, noooooo.

        • Ginny says
          Posted June 26, 2015

          Anyway, I absolutely love the hair tutorials. I really really do. I wish the blog was more that. But it “seems” different now. Like real heavy on the sponsorship. I know people make $$ through blogs, I do and there is nothing wrong with that. But things just don’t seem like they used to…… It didn’t feel as natural of a blog as it once did. (?)

        • Kelly says
          Posted June 26, 2015

          I agree that this blog has changed a lot over time, but so has Kate’s life. I guess I believe it is her blog and she should be able to post on it as she sees fit. I am wondering why some people continue to read her blog and keep up on all the details going on for her if it is bothering them? As a new mom myself, I found so much relief in reading this post. Relief that I’m not the only one learning about flexibility. Relief that I am not the only one feeling dog-tired even though others most definitely have it worse. It’s not a competition. I read this blog because I love the hair tutorials and beauty advice and I also love reading about her experiences as a mom. Kate seems like a positive, kind, Christian, hard working individual. I am aware that I don’t know everything about her life, but I sure do enjoy occasionally reading her blog!

          Happy birthday, Kate! I hope you had a wonderful rest of your day, that your husband feels better soon, and that those cute boys sleep in well for you tomorrow!

        • Ashley says
          Posted June 26, 2015

          Hey Ginny, we might be “fan girls” but you somehow knowing how much Kate paid for her house makes you a stalker. For someone who dislikes Kate and what she says so much, it kinda sounds like you spend a little bit too much time tracking her every move…literally. #weirdo

    • Keshia says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      I hope you start getting some sleep soon because you do seem like you need it We as moms need to stick together and encourage one another, and not judge or assume. Being a mom is hard sometimes, especially when the littles ones throw curve balls. Try having a little more compassion because people might not extend that courtesy to you if this is how you usually treat people. I hope your little one starts sleeping better.

      Happy birthday Kate!

      • Keshia says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        That is for Chelsie

    • Leslie says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Sounds like you got up on the wrong side of the bed Chelsie! Geesh! Try the book, ‘Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child’. My two slept 11 hours at night by 6-8 months. 11! And they both took two 2 hour naps during the day. My 3 year old still takes 2.5 hour naps most days. Happy mommy, happy family, right?!

    • Melissa Brooks says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Get over yourself lady. Kate was being real. Just keep your mouth shut and wish her a Happy Birthday. We are all mom’s and should be encouraging each other not snapping at each other. Good Grief.

      • Jen says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Then why are you snapping at Chelsie and telling her to keep her mouth shut and get over herself? That is certainly not what I would call encouragement.

    • Jessica says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Chelsie: Why are you taking your bad experience out on others? Especially someone also going through a rough time. It sounds like you’re coming from a really dark place. Instead of spending your energy bringing someone else down, I’d think about reaching out for some help if you’re overwhelmed. Or spend some time helping someone else in an even worse situation. I think you’d be surprised how much it would help. Not speaking from a soap box, but from my own experience. Hope you find some peace. It gets better. And maybe stay off social media in the meantime. Focus on you and your family.

      • Jen says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        I doubt she is coming from a “really dark place”, other than sleep deprivation. It just sounds like a comment from one very tired mom. We’ve all been there. Please don’t spend YOUR time “bringing someone else down”. It’s just silly. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and their story, even if it doesn’t agree with the one belonging to the author of this post, who was also complaining, I might add.

        • Jessica says
          Posted June 26, 2015

          Jen: I think you’re confused. Kate’s post was about sharing her experience in a relatable way. And sharing what she’s learned from it. Which I found quite helpful. My opinion, which, like you said, everyone is entitled to have and to share, was that Chelsie was posting to belittle Kate. Which Is probably hurtful to her and, since I related to this post, was hurtful to me. So, instead of trying to bring Chelsie down, I tried to share some genuine advice from my own experience. I guess you found this offensive. Life is hard for people in all sorts of ways. I won’t comment further on this thread to take away from Kate’s post and well wishes.

          • Jen says
            Posted June 26, 2015

            I’m not confused, but bless your heart for your concern. I wasn’t offended by your comment at all! We moms are all in this together. Life can be hard, but it’s also wonderful, and I think we all just need to keep that in mind. Enjoy the weekend!

  29. Rebecca says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! You had me at “You’ve got to be kidding me!” I’ve said that phrase so many times as things that I didn’t want to have happen did…and visa versa. It sounds like you are doing exactly what Crystal Paine with MoneySavingMom is talking about in her new course “Make Over Your Mornings.” I’m currently going through it and I’m realizing that if I get up before the rest of the household does, my mornings (and consequently my days) will be much better.

    Chin up, Kate! Enjoy your birthday with your family. One smile from those babies and you’ll melt!

  30. Laurie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Cheers and Happy Birthday!!! And go out tonight, even a little bit of time away will be worth it.

  31. Lauren says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate! Thanks for choosing to write this post. I’m so glad I’m not the only one who has pacifier battles.

  32. Becca says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! I hope you have a wonderful day and are able to celebrate with all your boys; even if it means waiting a few days till everyone is more happy & well!

    A note on the iced coffee – I cold brew mine in my French press so when I am ready to enjoy it I can just put the cover/plunger in and it separates the grounds from the coffee & works well for me!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      You know I have a french press! I need to try that!

  33. Chelsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! So my first Mother’s Day I was pregnant again and the smell of them trying to make me breakfast marked the start of my morning sickness. My birthday was a few months later and I still was sick.
    The next year my son ran in to my room mother’s day morning and got sick all over me and our bed. On my birthday our daughter woke up every two hours the night before and the whole next week.
    This year my son touched my parent’s cat and broke out in hives and my birthday is next month so wish me luck!
    Nothing like that ever happens on Father’s Day!
    I bought a really basic expresso machine at Target. It brews really quickly and the grounds fuse together into one easy to toss chunk! I drink an ice coffee every afternoon.

    • Dana says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      “Nothing like that ever happens on Father’s Day!”

      TRUTH

  34. amanda says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! It might not have started on the right foot BUT if you start at the bottom it can only go up from there. Whenever I’m having an off day and my child just doesn’t seem interested in following my plans for the day (what one year old does anyway lol) I try to remind myself that one day he will be grown and I will wish for just one more sleepless night with him. Think of how many birthdays your boys will miss because they will be grown and off to college or starting families of their own. Its thoughts like those that help me feel grateful for the present day (even if it’s a crappy one).

  35. Victoria S. says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    There might be a thing about 29th birthdays- when I had mine two years ago, it was surrounded by great expectations. It fell during a conference I was attending during grad school in San Francisco. I had planned to visit the golden gate bridge, see THE Full House and take a day exploring and eating the best of the city. Well the quick dinner the night before landed me with the worst case of food poisoning I have ever had so I spend the day quietly trying not to die in my hotel room while my classmates/friends enjoyed my birthday plans without me. Birthdays are overrated- the other 364 days can be ( and typically are) just as awesome. Happy 29th year Kate-may it be your best yet 🙂

    • January says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      I agree with this – my 29th birthday was not a particularly happy one, but 30 was a totally different story. 🙂 Happy birthday!

  36. Cathy McDonald says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! We have that magic number in common … You’ve turned 29 and I have had anniversaries of 29…lots of anniversaries of 29!

    While your sleep deprivation is all consuming at this point in your life, enjoy the gift of love from your family and relish these days of building memories and traditions with your boys. As I have discovered with my own family, time goes by way too quickly and the hurried pace of life will blur the joys of coos, giggles and snuggles, and 4am wake up calls!

    Happy Birthday! You have my permission to join me in celebrating number 29 every year forever more!

  37. Michelle Taylor says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!

  38. Jennifer says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I remember those days, close to ten years ago. I was a stay-at-home mom to two boys who are exactly a year apart. My youngest had colic. However, ten years later, my ten and eleven year old boys are best friends, and opposites, which totally works for our family and for them. You just wait, the time will fly. God will not give you more than you can handle. Make sure to carve out some time for yourself. When they are napping, don’t rush to clean up a mess, sit with your iced coffee and do something just for you. You must create those “just mommy” times in order to restore your sanity, and don’t ever feel guilty over that. And hey, at least it is not your 30th birthday, your due celebration will be then, when Luke is out of this stage and into everything! Smiles and hugs to you, hang in there, mom, you got this.

  39. Sherri Y. says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate! This post is so real & I love it 🙂 Because with 2 girls (6 & 1), a little one on the way, & having recently moved, I totally get the need for sleep & wanting (needing!) that time to yourself in the morning 🙂 Many blessings on your day & may the rest of your day go so much better than planned! And I hope too, that you get your date tonight 🙂

  40. Sara says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday kate! Wow. I am very much able to relate and want to thank you for making the decision to type this when you did. I have a post colicky 9 month old baby girl who didn’t inherit the “I-love-to-sleep” gene that my husband and I both possess. We have difficult bedtimes and always early mornings so I am with you on the sleep deprivation thing!! Hopefully your sweet boys will take some rockstar naps so you can too! Happy 29 and cheers to another trip around the sun !

  41. Joy says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Seems like this is the theme for every birthday and holiday around my joint!!! Why is that?! Ordinary days generally go off without a hitch…oh well. I’ll never know. Wishing you a very happy 29th birthday:)

  42. Micah says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Oh, Kate, I know exactly where you are. I had 4 in 5 years and there were some rough days in there. And people always told me “it will get better” and I’m like – yeah but how is that helping me now . But you know, it DID get better. Now they are 4,7,8,and 9 and they sleep all night and don’t wake up until NINE. Like 9:00. And they fix their own breakfast! Yep it’s totally worth it. Hang in there, momma. Enjoy the good days and stick it out through the tough days and thank God for both! I just love how real and relatable you are! Happy birthday!! Hope Justin has a quick recovery and you can go out this weekend!!

  43. Ashley Hlavaty says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I love that you’re keeping it real! Too bad we’re not best buds, because you could’ve called me during your cruddy morning while I was having my own cruddy morning. At 4:23 I found myself wide awake with crazy back pain. I’m 24 weeks pregnant and having the hardest time this time around. I tried everything to get back to sleep, even considered taking a walk. It’s probably the nicest time to walk since it’s already 95+ and humid as all get out in North Texas. Instead I ate a bowl of cereal and tried to fall asleep on the couch while this baby girl inside of me decided to do somersaults. Hubby woke me at 7:00 as he left for work and I’m taking this quiet time to catch up on your blog while my 3.5 year old still sleeps. I pray that I get that much needed nap this afternoon, but I better plan on a full day of busy fun with my boy instead.

    I hope that you have a great birthday and that your spa day is amazing!!!!!

  44. AmieS says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    First and foremost, Happy Birthday!
    I have a 2 month old, so getting up in the middle of the night is expected. But, last night he slept from 9 pm to 4 am! However, my dog, decided it was a good night to bark is ever lovin head off at two different instances. One, right next to my head. Then, baby boy decided to half-wake an hour and a half after our 4 am feeding. And wouldn’t easily be soothed. I finally got him down and got back into bed when he woke again. A loud profanity escaped my mouth, which woke my husband, so he went in and finished the sooth. Coffee is my friend, though since I am breastfeeding it is decaf. Ugh.

  45. Meredith G says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kate! Happy Birthday! I totally understand where you are coming from. I am in the trenches with you! A good friend of mine (with grown children) always reminds me, “This is just a season.” Sometimes, the days can seem endless….but I know that the four years since my son was born have seemed to fly by me. Thanks for your transparency, and for putting words to this same frustrated feeling I often experience. These feelings are indeed grounded in selfish desires and a need to be in control. A servant’s heart and a pliable spirit are what I need to cultivate, as well. Let’s keep keeping on…and drinking lots of coffee!!!

  46. Tina says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! I am totally right along there with you- it’s a conscious decision NOT to be upset when our kiddos wake up earlier than we would like! Enjoy that iced coffee.

  47. Elise says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I don’t have much to offer on the sleep front other than maybe you’ll be gifted by a double nap later from your boys and then you can have one too. 🙂 I just bought this for my husband for Father’s Day: http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/hario-cold-process-immersion-coffee-brewer/?pkey=e%7Ccold%2Bpress%2Bcoffee%7C174%7Cbest%7C0%7C1%7C24%7C%7C7&cm_src=PRODUCTSEARCH||NoFacet-_-NoFacet-_-NoMerchRules
    We LOVE it so far! Easy clean up, easy set up, yummy iced coffee. AND, it doesn’t take up much space or cost very much. 🙂

  48. Kacie M. says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I hope you have a great day with your family – even with Justin sick and those boys of yours not letting you sleep in. It can only get better, right?

  49. Kristin says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I swear for every holiday one or both of my boys is sick! My 18 month old was sick last month right before my 29th birthday with the stomach flu. We thought he was better because by that point he had been acting and eating fine, then at my birthday dinner got sick all over the table. That put a damper on my night really quickly!
    My boys are doing OK sleeping in now that we are on summer vacation, but now it’s the puppy that wakes me up between 5-6. If I don’t jump up immediately to let her out she keeps barking and wakes up the boys. I am still trying to appreciate that then I get to get my workout in before I have 2 little helpers! 😉
    I hope you are able to have a good day even if you have to postpone your celebration!

  50. Carli says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!!! Thanks for being so honest and making me feel better about my own expectations with my 20 month old!!! 🙂

  51. Meg says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!! Thanks for being so great. I look forward to your blog so much. As a new mom of a 7 week old I’m right there with you. I need to remember to breathe and celebrate the little victories. Thanks for being such a bright ray of light!

  52. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!!! Cheers to 29 and the last wonderful year of your twenties!! 🙂 XO

  53. Kris says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Look on the bright side, it could be worse!!! Hopefully the day picks up and goes better. On my birthday I got to wake up super bright and early because it was one of the busiest and stressful times of the month at work. I got to spend the entire day away from my two kids 🙁 feverishly working away to hit a deadline – all in a boring grey office with absolutely no windows to the outside world. Not that it would have mattered, because it rained alllll day. I was exhausted by the time that I got home, so we did nothing.

    I feel like after I’ve had kids I care about my own birthday less and less. If I can somehow sneak in 30 minutes of quiet time on that day, I’m usually pretty happy with that! 🙂

  54. Britt says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate! For what it’s worth, I think this honest account of your feelings at a particular moment in time is absolutely fine and you others shouldn’t try to make you feel bad for it. From one mom to another, I totally get how sometimes it feels like you don’t get one day (or even an hour) to yourself, especially on days like your birthday. I hope you can celebrate in a special way soon.

  55. Lindsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday Kate! I love reading your blog! I have a 18 month old son too, so I can totally relate to you that way. As well as being a cosmetologist, I love reading everything you have to say.
    This blog is your space and I’m so glad you are so real about life with children. It can be tough but it’s all worth it!
    Have a fabulous day! Keep smiling:)

  56. Sarah says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! My oldest is 8 today and cried because he is going to college and leaving me soon. (I’m not overly dramatic at all.) I know that annoyed wake up early feeling very well. cheers to you, on my second cup of coffee, going to be a great day!

  57. Taleen says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! Thanks for keeping it real…it’s not all puppy dogs and rainbows and you certainly are entitled to your opinion. My baby will turn 21 this year and he still wakes me at 4 a.m…just going to sleep not waking up from sleep! Have a great day.

  58. Posted June 26, 2015

    Oh, that lack of sleep is hard, especially when the husband is sick! Hope that he’s feeling better, the boys take really good naps today, and that you get a chance to treat yourself today–maybe some iced coffee (and a donut, too, just because!) Happy birthday!

  59. Nilda says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Despite reading your blog all these years, I forget we have the same birthday! I’m 30 today and my little man (10 months) stirred at 4 and only fell back asleep once I brought him back to my room. It’s my husband’s birthday too and we were both hoping to have full uninterrupted sleep too!
    But happy birthday! I hope you have a good one!

  60. Phon Wills says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, 29 and feelin FINE! haha You’ve hit the nail on the head so many times in this post. Started off w/ I don’t know if I should do this because I feel annoyed:: that’s how I feel w/ my 2 about 78% of my day. My kids are 11 months apart and they’re now 4 & 5 but they play together well, you’ll enjoy that when they’re older! And yes, selfishness and controlling tendencies go out the window w/ kids. You’re day will be amazing! Happy Birthday again 🙂

  61. Skyler says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thank you so much, Kate, for being so real and honest. It is one of the reasons I love to read your blog. As a fellow mom to little people, I can relate, and I, too, am working on being more flexible.
    I hope you have the happiest of birthdays with your sweet little family surrounding you!

  62. Sarah F says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I know today is going great, but you still look beautiful as ever! I’d never know you were sleep deprived 🙂

    • Sarah F says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Meant to say ISN’T going great.

  63. Emily Lutz says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kate, you have such an honest, great attitude and I enjoy reading it so much! Happy 29th birthday!

  64. Whitney Winegar says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! You are speaking my language today. I do not like it when days start not on my terms (4 year old and 2 year old). My advice, extra caffeine later or a good power nap. Also, extra screen time if you’re older one likes cartoons. Good luck today!

  65. Sheenajoy says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! As a mom of a 1 and 2 year old, this is so close to my heart! Sometimes the quiet morning is as much or more needed then the sleep.
    These days are so hard, especially when you feel the tiny terrorists are plotting against you 🙂 cartoons and snuggles are most important today! Hope your day is the best yet!
    Much love!

  66. Danielle says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I don’t know how I missed that our birthday’s were so close, I turn 28 on Sunday. 🙂 And am expecting baby #2 in exactly 3 weeks, so I have a strong feeling my thoughts will be much like yours soon!

  67. Rayel says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I’ve been there! Pick a perfect weekend for your birthday and celebrate when your husband is healthy and can let you sleep in ;). I used to have to take midterms on my birthday, and had to pick a better day to celebrate and I’ve carried this tradition into my mothering years.

  68. Rachele says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!!

    Take a raincheck on your birthday sleep for when Justin is feeling better.

  69. Kari says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! Good for you turning a not so great situation into a learning and reflective moment for yourself! I hope your day takes a turn for the better! Enjoy it!

  70. lindsay says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!!! And, please, please – start buying this iced coffee – http://www.target.com/p/starbucks-iced-coffee-lightly-sweet-48oz/-/A-15605614. If you don’t like it sweetened, you can buy it unsweetened too. It is amazing. I tried quitting it but I just can’t. It is SO easy! Pour, splash half and half and it is delish. There are always cartwheel coupons for it at Target. It is worth EVERY penny, which is still cheaper than buying iced coffee at a coffee shop so you can still feel good about that 🙂

  71. Jennifer says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate!! Hope you have a great day celebrating with your boys!!

  72. Posted June 26, 2015

    Good morning Kate and Happy Bday 🙂 I can so relate to what you’re going through. My son just turned 5 months old and for the first 3 1/2 months of his life he really slept like a champ. All the sudden things shifted and after going to bed around 8:30-9pm he started waking up anywhere from 1-3:30am. It has been some of the hardest nights and early mornings (I work full time). Mother’s Day looked a lot like your birthday and I too was very bitter and disappointed. I felt like I was entitled to this one day of sleeping in if not any other day…right?? I guess motherhood is filled with moments like this but I think when we come out of these hard times in our childs early life we will look back an be proud that we did it and eventually we wont even remember how hard those crazy nights/days were. Hope today brings you some much needed rest relaxation and happiness 🙂

  73. Kristin says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Hope you have a Happy Birthday! I also struggle with this with my 16 month old son. You definitely are not alone!

  74. Jen Staffeldt says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kudos to you! Balance, happiness, the continued journey of evolving into our best self for us and our kiddos is a fight every day but it seems like you’re getting there (just like the rest of us).

    Happy birthday to you – and I hope you have some time today to get that iced coffee and just relax!

  75. Jill P says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Have a happy day! Hope Justin feels better and that you enjoy a night out. Your site is great. I love your hair-make up-style-etc.tips. Enjoy being 29 and enjoy your boys!!! -Jill from Maine 🙂

  76. Tami S says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I just turned 29 on Monday! I understand how you feel. I have a 2 year old and I am still trying to work on my selfishness. It is definitely worse when he occassionally decides to wake up at 3 in the morning and refuses to go back to bed. I get frustrated because I want to go back to sleep so badly. I love that you are being real about your struggles with motherhood. It helps to know other mothers are going through similar things.

  77. May says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate!
    I’m right there with you… Every night before I go to sleep, I tell myself that tomorrow will be great and I’ll have the patience of a saint, but it’s always a toss up in the morning with my three rugrats 😉 It’s so hard to alter our expectations when little troublemakers become the center of our world, and what’s even more difficult is accepting that it’s okay to be upset about it. We’re not just moms, we’re women with our own wants, needs and interests (and having it all, every day, is hard)!
    So, here’s to balance for all of us <3
    Cheers!

  78. Kim says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Cheers Kate! I never do well with super early morning wake up calls from my 2.5 year old. This year I turn 30 and I’m pregnant with my second, due one day before my bday. I probably won’t even remember I’ve turned 30 🙂 Happy Birthday Kate!! I hope your hubby feels better and the boys are easy on you!!

  79. Lindsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thanks for this post Kate! You put into perfect words how I was feeling this morning (in fact, how I feel many mornings and often throughout the day)! My 3.5 month old was up at 5 a.m. (granted I was suppose to be up at 5:30 to get ready for work, but I really wanted those extra 30 minutes!). I thought I’d catch up on my DVR since I was up feeding the baby, but her big sister had other plans for me – which basically included waking up and crying irrationally for over 20 minutes. Thanks for reminding me that I’m not alone in my thoughts of wanting to sleep, have a moment to myself and wanting to control my day. Have a very happy birthday too!

  80. Lisa says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! Today my husband and I are celebrating our 5 year anniversary. We have a 14 month old now and struggled with his sleep since day one, until he was 11 months old. Almost one full year!! No one, and I mean no one, who has never seen sleep deprivation as a result from poorly sleeping children, will never know or understand what it can do to your mental and emtotional state. It’s amazing what lack of sleep can do to a person!! Your words are a lot kinder and patient than mine were at 4 am!! Hang in there Kate, you’re an amazing mom and your boys are lucky to have you!! Love your blog 🙂

  81. Jen says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I am right with you on the early wakeup! We had bad storms here in Illinois last night and my son, who was seeming to be getting a good night’s sleep got woken up at 10pm and then the whole night was thrown off with his final wakeup call at 4:56 AM. I tried to get him to sleep until almost 6 but that was damn near impossible. I have the same issue letting control go and trying NOT to predict what he will do. It’s hard. But kid’s teach us lessons every day and I know mine is trying to teach me to go with the flow! Have a great 29th year!

  82. Melissa Brooks says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate!!! May God richly bless you and your family in the years to come!

  83. Maren says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!

  84. Alysha says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! Mine was yesterday and started with a nice cat-sized hairball on my carpet(the stain from which I have not had time to remove and now have several guests coming over tonight…hopefully the time/cleaning gods are on my side today!) Sometimes you just have to roll with the punches…my day ended up being wonderful and I’m sure yours will too!

  85. Dawn says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I have two kids-5 yo girl and 2 yo boy. You know what? That is life. Plan for the unplanned. I feel for you and I know exactly where you are coming from. Don’t you appreciate your parents more? I sure do. I remember the sleep deprivation all too much. You will get through it. When you are in it, it feels like eternity. But you will get through it. I remember telling myself that my kids one day will be out of the house and we will have an empty home. So I try to enjoy the circus at our house. There is never a dull moment. 🙂 Seriously! I am not dealing with sleep deprivation now, just a crazy life of two parents working outside the home and two very energetic and lively (and of course, dependent) kids. BUT, I wouldn’t change the world! I know it is a struggle…believe me I know! However, remember to enjoy the ride. Really notice the small things that are easily hidden under the chaos/sleep deprivation. A smile, your adorable children, how proud you are, etc. I have learned that you just gotta roll with it. You are a good mom and your children love you! Feel free to vent anytime 🙂

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Totally appreciate my parents more!

  86. Dawn says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I have two kids-5 yo girl and 2 yo boy. You know what? That is life. Plan for the unplanned. I feel for you and I know exactly where you are coming from. Don’t you appreciate your parents more? I sure do. I remember the sleep deprivation all too much. You will get through it. When you are in it, it feels like eternity. But you will get through it. I remember telling myself that my kids one day will be out of the house and we will have an empty home. So I try to enjoy the circus at our house. There is never a dull moment. 🙂 Seriously! I am not dealing with sleep deprivation now, just a crazy life of two parents working outside the home and two very energetic and lively (and of course, dependent) kids. BUT, I wouldn’t change the world! I know it is a struggle…believe me I know! However, remember to enjoy the ride. Really notice the small things that are easily hidden under the chaos/sleep deprivation. A smile, your adorable children, how proud you are, etc. I have learned that you just gotta roll with it. You are a good mom and your children love you! Feel free to vent anytime 🙂 Oh, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

  87. Adrienne says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!

    And I can completely relate to you. Those early mornings are so tough. I also find every little thing extra annoying that time of day haha. “Why are there coffee grinds everywhere”, I totally get that.

  88. Jennifer says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!! This post really sums up what I feel lately. I have a 2 year old and 16 week old and I’m trying so hard to work on my expectations and letting go of control while keeping some order to the chaos and tap down my frustrations because they are kids and babies and – yeah just all of this. Bonus for today – the 2 year old woke up with the throw up bug 🙁 at least my husband is able to stay home and help.

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Glad your husband could help!

  89. Lori says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!

  90. Lise B says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I am exactly a week older, but I’d give anything to swap lives with you for a day! I even have two cats and a Justin at home … no cute little boys though!

    Happy Birthday Kate – and many many more!

  91. Steph says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! Wishing you a good nights sleep and a healthy husband, and some easier coffee.

    I’m feeling life is wonderful right now, I have a 3 year old who sleeps wonderfully and still naps. But, I’ve got one on the way and I’m dreading the sleep deprevation! I think it goes without saying that we all feel blessed and grateful, but sleep deprevation is hard! It’s wonderful that you can vent to a community of moms for support (both to give and receive). I hope a few negative comments you receive don’t deter you from sharing your life in a way that makes you feel good.

  92. Posted June 26, 2015

    on days I’m ready to be unhappy and complainy–I concentrate on the good’ol’standby happy thought “well, I do have indoor plumbing, and I LovE that!” . . . But you did good without the help 🙂
    happy birthday MommaBear! . .another year wiser ♡

  93. Kristen says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    My husband and I contemplate a second child often and I am thankful when I read your blog because I think sometimes we get caught up in the “aww new baby, so exciting” idea that we don’t realize how challenging it can be. I thank you for these particular posts. Motherhood is difficult with one. I often wonder how we will balance two. You’re a champ! Happy birthday!

  94. Heidi Stone says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, pretty girl!

    You’re not in this alone! While my boys are older, 17 & 10, and I’m not dealing with those early mornings like that anymore, reading this post made me smile. It took me back to that time in my life, where every wink you can get is needed and necessary! I absolutely adore your outlook and perspective, and the ability to find it at such a trying time. I was much younger when I became a mama, I’m 36, and I didn’t have the maturity to sometimes put aside my own selfishness and embrace the chaos. Kudos to you! This too shall pass, but don’t will it away. I find myself weepy at times that my boys are growing so quickly! I blinked and I have a 17 year old! I know his days at home are numbered, so thanks, Kate, for reminding me what it was like to be a young mama again!

  95. Posted June 26, 2015

    First of all: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! You are doing an amazing job with those boys. Pat yourself on the back, take a deep breath and know you are doing holy work. Lord knows I have had my moments of rage and anger from being sleep deprived. I know it all too well. What helps me get through is knowing that this is a moment in time. A moment in time in our lives when we are so needed and spread so thin. And that one day it will suddenly feel like a memory. Nothing in this motherhood journey is permanent, its always changing, in the most beautiful way. And these babies are our greatest teachers. I hope you have a wonderful day celebrating your birthday with your family, and hopefully will get a great nap if possible!! Sending you hugs!

  96. Kristi says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I had a similar unexpected start to my day with my two and a half month old. In fact, I was so disoriented that when my husband asked me what time it was I replied incorrectly and her ended up at work an hour early!

  97. Meg says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I love iced coffee too, and have been really happy with my Primula iced coffee maker from bed bath and beyond. $30, but $24 with a 20% coupon. Super easy to use and a pretty pitcher to boot. Hope you have a great day despite your early wake up.

  98. Denise says
    Posted June 26, 2015
  99. Christy says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! I’ve been there and one of my birthday 10 years ago I turned 33 on that day I was in the hospital waiting for doctors to give me good news to start gallbladder surgery but instead they give me bad news. I was cried and cried. I just wanted to get over with surgery and go home to be with my 5 years old son who just started kindergarten that I had missed (I had surgery day after birthday) so that wasn’t the best birthday I had. I was sick on one of my birthday once but can’t remember when was it. It happens to everyone. You will get special one when Justin is 100 percent better give you a big break so you can enjoy your own time. Hang in there.

  100. Kara says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I loved this post. As someone who is almost 40 and still single, it reminds me that no matter what stage of life we are in, we all struggle with our expectations not being met and having to work on managing that. Your post was real but not whiny, understandable and yet finding the positive. Thank you for sharing the start to your day with us just as you would with a friend. Hope it only gets better from here!

  101. Aileen says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! I love this raw, real post about your babies and being a mom. It’s great! I laughed at predicting their days is like playing the lottery. It’s so true! Please keep posting about your boys, family, and motherhood. Cheers to 29! Hope your iced coffee keeps you cool today – these 90+ degree days are killer! And you should have a big glass of wine tonight to celebrate too! (And especially after that nasty comment above. Motherhood is/should be a sweet bond between women).

  102. Krista says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate!! I recently celebrated my 29th birthday as well and my day with my 9 month old was quite similar to yours. Like I said to my husband, “babies don’t care if it’s your birthday.” But we care, so have the happiest birthday lady 🙂

  103. Anne says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! I love reading your blog. Thank you for sharing and keeping it real.

  104. Jenny says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Oh dear, I hope you get a wonderful birthday nap in! I hope your children take some lovely naps, and I hope your husband starts to feel better. If you don’t get to go out for your birthday, then perhaps another night when everyone feels better would be best. Happiest of birthdays to you! I hope you at least get to eat some cake and ice cream. 🙂
    xx
    Jenny // Mish Mosh Makeup

  105. Quinn says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thanks for sharing your adorable family. It’s fun to watch and I appreciate your hair tutorials! IMHO, your content’s readability and overall blog quality would greatly improve by cleaning up grammar and punctuation – it’s distracting to read good content filled with errors. Here’s a fun site to poke around, in case you find yourself with a spare minute: http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/grammar-gir. Or don’t; totally up to you. 🙂

  106. Heidi C says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I loved this post. Real, unedited glimpses into what it’s actually like being a mom. Early mornings, praying for more sleep, less-than-perfect attitudes. I especially love how you turned it around, appreciated the “me time”, and remembered what really counts. That is the part I fail at most often. Thank you for the reminder.

    And happy birthday!

  107. Jessica T says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    My husband now uses the Toddy cold brew coffee system because of the mess of dealing with straining the grounds: http://www.williams-sonoma.com/products/toddy-cold-brew-coffee-system/ (you can find it on amazon too). No messing with straining coffee grounds through the cheesecloth anymore! Had it about 6 months now, and so far so good! Also wanted to note that it makes crazy strong, concentrated coffee.

    p.s. Happy birthday!

    • Talley says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      My husband has a toddy too! It makes about 2 weeks of coffee concentrate in 24 hours, Kate! YOU NEED THIS.

  108. April says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Have you tried the Starbucks bottled iced coffee? They sell it in big jugs at the grocery store (near the milk). I like to get the caramel flavor and add vanilla creamer to it. It’s delicious. I haven’t had coffee in months because I’m about to have a baby in a month, but I can’t wait to start drinking it again (in moderation of course).

  109. Lindsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! Thanks for being so real, I am a working mom of a two year old daughter and another one due in September, its really tough sometimes. The lack of sleep is awful. Its great reading I am not the only who feels like this sometimes. And I love you posted about your outfit yesterday, you look beautiful and always give me great & affordable ideas I can use!!
    Have a great weekend,
    Lindsey

  110. Heather says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    This is the best method I’ve found for making iced coffee:

    Brew 10 cups of coffee on “strong brew” (aka it drips slower). While that’s brewing, fill a 2 qt pitcher with 1 qt of ice, after the coffee is finished pour it directly over the ice. Allow that to sit in the fridge over night. I prefer Dunkin Donuts fresh ground coffee, but I’m sure anything would be delicious!

    Happy Birthday!!

  111. Stephanie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I feel for you. This was supposed to be my self-care day. My day started at 12:30am when my daughter (14 months) had a barf attack… and again at 1:30, and 3:30, and 4:30. Aaand I’m 27 weeks pregnant. So, instead of mom-care day, it’s a care-for-the-baby day, and self-care will wait. This parenting gig is one long rollercoaster adventure, isn’t it? Hope your day goes smoothly, and the boys take long naps! My girl is napping as I type… your blog is refreshing moment for me in the midst of chaos. Thank you!

  112. Sara Sanchez says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! I so appreciate your authenticity in each and every post. I am thankful that you are real with how your day is going whether good or not so good. I am so sorry you have to deal with the negative that comes with that. Put on some tunes like House Party from Sam Hunt or Uptown Funk by Bruno Mars and dance it off on your day of birth!!

  113. Jennifer says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! I’m praying for you this afternoon.

  114. Stephanie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happiest of birthday to you! I follow your blog faithfully and it hits home all the time for me. I have two boys 5 and 3. and also just turned 29. I am such a planner and like things just so. Even 5 years later I struggle with the inconsistency of how the days can go. I feel selfish most days when I got to bed b/c I just wanted an hour of uninterrupted time. Someone once told me parenting is the hardest job you will ever love. Best wishes for the upcoming year and on your special day. Hopefully you can go out to supper this weekend if not tonight. take care!

  115. Lisa Hays says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Wishing you a Happy Birthday – and – maybe an afternoon birthday nap!

  116. Amy says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday sweet girl! My two boys are 10 and seven, and while I oh so remember the days of that crazy wake-up time, I also miss it! And funny enough, The 10-year old can sleep until 8:30, and the seven year old at 6:30. I still wish he slept later so my morning me time could be extended! But, I will say this… While the days are long, the years go by in the blink of an eye. I never understood that statement until I became a mom! I’m thankful for your messy bun post! It’s been a lifesaver for me!

  117. Jessica says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!!! I loved your post, not because I’m glad you had to go through that on your birthday, but because it’s real and honest and we fellow moms all get it. Motherhood is hard and messy and emotional, but at least we’re all in this together while we strive to do our best at this high calling. I hope your husband feels better soon and that you do get to celebrate today 🙂

  118. Lauren says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!

  119. Sydni says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!! I hope you have a great day today – and if not today, then I hope you have a great day tomorrow 😉

  120. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate!! Hope everything gets better!

  121. Heather says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! And you are not alone! Being a mama isn’t for the faint of heart! Hope your day turns out to be great!

  122. DonnaS says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! Oh I so remember these days. Just know that this won’t last forever. You will get good sleep again. Wishing you a good rest of the day!!

  123. Lauren says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Oh man. First of all, happy birthday! Been reading for a little while, but first time commenting. I so understand this. I feel like I’m always telling myself, “never groan and moan when they wake up” but of course we all do. And the other night after my husband and I had spent two nights in the hospital for a procedure, poor little girl didn’t sleep a wink. We were all SO tired that I behaved much more like a baby than she did. You know those times where they won’t sleep and you’re so tired you just cry along with them? Yeah, one of those nights. Anyway, we are all in it together. Loving on these babies and trying our hardest to get enough sleep! Here’s to 29!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      oh man that sounds rough. Hope you get on a regular sleep schedule again soon!

  124. Sharon says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I have been there many times– my birthday is ALWAYS in finals week. I hate it. Hope your day gets better. Happy birthday and don’t forget to do something fun sometime this weekend!

  125. Joyce says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Hi Kate,

    Happy birthday!!

    Your words could have been mine around thirteen years ago. With two boys 17 months apart it was very difficult for my little perfectionist self to be flexible. I had to tell myself in order for the boys and me to enjoy eachother I had to let go of wanting everything to be perfect. It wasn’t easy and I failed countless of times but now my boys are 13 and 14, wel balanced, social and eachothers best friends. It was worth the struggle! Good luck on your mama journey and once again happy birthday!!

  126. Heather says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday web friend! The final message of this post was well said. Cheers to being positive and looking on the brighter side of things. I hope your day is wonderful and the year ahead is nothing short of awesome!

    I hope your hubby gets well soon, too!

    Cheers,
    Heather

  127. Beth says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    In the words of my mom, “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans! 🙂 After having kids, etc; the one true thing that I quickly came to realize was that the only real form of control I have is when I clean out my closets. My closets get cleaned out A LOT. Happy 29th Birthday and many more to come!

  128. Elizabeth says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate!! Best wishes for a birthday week filled with laughter, love, good health, and great sleep for you (and your beautiful family)!

  129. stephanie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!

  130. Amy says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! 🙂

  131. denise says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I’m sorry your birthday got off to such a rough start. I hope the day improved!

    I can’t tell you how many years I had birthdays that I went to bed at the end of the day thinking, “well, I’d have been better off skipping today it was so awful.” But then at some point, miracle of miracles, birthdays improved. My kids got a little older and their father started prepping them to be nice to me all day and be on their best behavior. Now I love my birthday again and everyone treats me like a queen! 🙂

    I know that day is a ways off for you but I wanted to give you hope for the future.

  132. katie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I loved this post! I completely understand how your morning went! Thanks for sharing it with us. It always is nice to know we’re not alone in these motherhood days. Happy birthday! I’m 10 years ahead of you and life just gets better.

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Thanks for your support!

  133. Amanda says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! Thanks SO much for your honesty and vulnerability… I totally relate and believe that the best encouragement to other mama’s hearts is to just be real so that we can all know we are not alone. and sleep deprivation sucks!!! and we all struggle. Sending you lots of love!

  134. Laura says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Woah! I thought you were in your mid-30s.

    • Amanda says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Ouch! I’m not sure the best thing to tell a girl on her birthday is that you thought she was older than she actually is.

      • Kate says
        Posted June 26, 2015

        Seriously! Eek!

        • Leslie says
          Posted June 30, 2015

          PEOPLE, SERIOUSLY!?!!?!?! Kate – No, no, no you don’t look mid-30s.

    • Maeg says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      Laura, before I say or write something, I try to ask myself if what I have to share is kind, edifying and helpful…

    • Maeg says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      Happy Birthday Kate! Yuck! The “pinky game” as we called it went on for seemingly ever. But one day she found it herself and started sleeping longer and I started to become a person again. I was really stuck in the darkness of sleep deprivation and I didn’t really know how to put it into words because all I was ever asked was, “How grateful are you to have this miracle baby?” I have a lot of health conditions and she was and is my miracle girl. But my gratefulness did not negate the struggle I was going through with keeping up with her and my own health (or another child in your case). Keep your chin up because I promise you, “this too shall pass.” Blessings!

      • Maeg says
        Posted June 27, 2015

        “pinky game”

        • Maeg says
          Posted June 27, 2015

          binky game

  135. Lindsey says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Hi Kate!

    Happy Birthday! I don’t typically comment and even usually only read the post linked in my email. BUT…I connected so strongly to you on this and wanted to share with you my experience. I have three girls ages 9,6, & 3. None of them would have ever won the award for sleeping as infants. Heck, my 3 year old has started a whole new thing, getting up to potty in the night. 🙁 Back to my story. I need lots of sleep to be a happy person. It took me at least two children to really come to the realization that that just wasn’t my reality and wouldn’t be for quite some time. When I reflected on myself and attitude about my lack of sleep I saw a bad pattern. I looked through their eyes and saw that every time they bound in my room and stood wide eyed and bushy tailed next to me, still in the bed pretending like I didn’t hear them, with smiles on their faces and excitement for the day, I gave them the worst of me. I would tell them to go back to bed, ask how they could be up already, etc. You name it I said or did it. For years. Even if I was up, there were times I still had that attitude because I just wanted to get ready in silence for crying out loud. I had to dig very deep and God most certainly got a hold on my heart in this area. I felt terrible looking through their eyes and at times seeing the hurt in their eyes when I spoke harshly or was not happy to see them. So, I made one small step that turned into a bold movement in our home and changed me from the inside. I decided that no matter how little sleep or time to get ready I had had that morning I was going to greet them with a chipper voice and smile, a hug, or a tug on them to crawl in bed with me. Kate! It changed our lives. My kids did not look at me with fear/worry in their eyes when they saw me in the mornings. They became even more excited to see me. I have been doing this for a few years now and I still have to remind myself daily to do this. This does not come easy to me, although it is easier now than before. So, don’t feel bad about sharing, you are not alone. Don’t feel bad about the way you feel. It’s like my momma always told me, “You can’t help how you feel, but you can help how you react to those feelings.” Unfortunately 😉 I think she was right on this one. You are doing great! Keep on keeping on!

  136. Jenna says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday Kate! Hope Justin feels better soon, summer sickness sucks 🙁 re:coffee grounds, this is why I do iced tea! It’s all contained either in a steeper or a bag. Iced coffee is best left to the professionals lol 🙂 enjoy the rest of your day!
    -Jenna
    http://Www.loveabibliophile.com

  137. Annette says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Hope the rest of your day is going better! Happy birthday!! This post certainly brings back memories. Don’t miss the sleep deprivation! This too will pass. I remember the birthday I discovered I had lice!! Lovely “gift” from my kindergartener 😉

  138. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!! Mine 30th was yesterday and my son woke up an hour before he normally does.. then didn’t nap well at all.. so I feel ya!

    Cheers to you & 29!

  139. Heather says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Wishing you the Happiest of Birthdays today! Maybe the ending will be better than how it started…. Maybe you’ll end up in bed a little earlier (always my wish!) Hope you have a good one! Today is my birthday too! If it makes you feel any better, the dog woke me up today whining and I have been cleaning and doing laundry all day!

  140. Lisa T says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    First off HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I’m so sorry to hear the the hubs is sick, no fun at all. My day began at 4:22am. Something woke me out of dead sleep and scared the life out of me. Found out it was the grocery store across the street getting a delivery and the platform that lowers the stuff to the ground hit a bit hard and made a loud clanging noise. Had to get out of bed at 5:30 to get my youngest up, dressed, fed and out the door to meet her drill team. They have a state competition this weekend, nothing like packing a cranky 11 yo girl, a sleeping bag, air mattress, luggage, lunch bag, garment bag with uniform and backpack out the door at 6:15. So bleary eyed birthday wishes coming your way!

  141. Caitlin says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I don’t have any children but if every mother in the history of motherhood is right… These are the days you will look back on and miss! These days will soon be over and waking at 4 AM on your birthday won’t matter. “Going with the flow” is what it is all about and will help you really appreciate your husband, children and life!

  142. Jessica says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Do you realize what you just did? You literally taught every single one of your readers one of the most important lessons you can ever learn in life, which is that stress is inevitable, but the way it effects you is not. Ultimately you have a choice when it comes to the way you react to life, and it took me a solid 30 years to learn that. So with that being said, I think 29 is off to an awesome start for you! Congratulations on everything, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Thank you Jessica!

  143. Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I had a similar experience on my birthday this year…and a difficult day seems to be made even worse when it falls on your birthday! Bummer! I try to keep 2 things in mind when I feel at the end of my rope in the “way-to-early-to-be-up” hours (1) I’m not the only mommy awake. And your post will help me remember that! and (2) I would rather be awake with my sweet girl before the sun comes up, than get to sleep through the whole night because I didnt have her in my life 🙂

    I hope you got to take a birthday nap! And you are doing such a great job with your boys! I love reading about how God is growing you to be their momma 🙂

  144. Meagan says
    Posted June 26, 2015
  145. Carolina says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday Kate! It’s my birthday too Sorry that you had to start yours so early with your precious babies. My kids, for a change, let me sleep in until 8:30 am! It’s extremely rare in our home. I hope you continue to be blessed and thank you so much for continuing with your blog. I absolutely love it.

  146. Megan says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday! What is it about today that has kids waking early?! My 2-year-old woke two hours earlier than her usual. Not earth-shattering, but not my fave way to start the day eithrr. But I can’t complain too much because my diy cold brew turned out and was loyally waiting for me! 😉

  147. Amanda says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I totally feel you on this today – we also just moved into a new house a week ago and I’m convinced it’s causing the sleep troubles around these parts lately. New environment, adjusting to new sights, smells, sounds, etc. Hopefully it gets better…and Happy Birthday!

  148. Megan says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate! I love your blog and it always makes me smile. Thank you so much for your honesty – I can’t relate, but I do appreciate you cutting through the noise and preparing me for the someday reality of motherhood. I hope you enjoy your day with all your boys, even if you are a bit sleepy. Cheers to 29!

  149. Pesh says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kate, I think you need some perspective. Would you rather have the alternative? Wake up all alone on your 29th birthday with no kids and no husband. You just bought a brand new house and have a great family and get to stay home to raise your children. That’s a lot more than a lot of people can say.

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      My sharing a tough, humbling moment does not mean I’m not grateful for my family and my home. Your assumption is completely off base.

      • Amba McCrudden says
        Posted June 27, 2015

        Honestly Kate, please disregard the negative posts. In a world that at times is far more negative than it needs to be I would like to think that we can all show a little compassion for their feelings on their PERSONAL blog. Be kind people!!!!!!!!

  150. Evelyn Nunes says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    They went back to sleep, yay!! Happy birthday!! Hope you have a blessed year, and tell the boys to give you extra hugs today!!

  151. Edie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday!

    Maybe you could do the following:

    Say THANK YOU for……..

    Having HEALTHY children.
    Having your parents and your siblings
    Having a great husband.
    Having enough money that you don’t have to leave your kids with someone else while you have to endure a long commute to go to a stressful job.
    Having a nice new house.
    Having your health.

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Edie, just because I wrote about an unpleasant hour or so in my life doesn’t mean I’m not thankful for everything you listed above.

  152. Jill says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kate, if it makes you feel any better, my husband totally forgot my birthday a few yrs ago:(
    I’m sure those sweet boys would wish you a happy b-day if they could talk!
    Hopefully, you two can celebrate (alone) when he’s feeling better!

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      oh man that’s terrible! I bet he’ll never forget again!

  153. Laura C says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy birthday!
    Even through sleep deprivation and people being mean to you in the comment section here, you are one of the most beautiful women on the planet. I am one of your “older” readers, 53, and would love to know someone so sweet and kind as you. Being a mom-veteran of four children, I can tell you for absolute certain that these days will soon be behind you. Take care of yourself.
    I remember a birthday morning many years ago. I was sitting quietly with my coffee before anyone woke up, and the cat came and puked at my feet. Sigh…at the time, not so funny…now, however…

    • Kate says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      Thanks for your kind words Laura, it means a lot and helps me ignore the ignorant comments! Cat puking at your feet is the WORST. 🙂

  154. penny says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! When you have an exhausting night or morning like you did having something to look forward to like going out to dinner helps you get through the day. But knowing your not going anywhere and having “another human” to take care of is overwelming at the time. You will laugh about it in the days to come.

  155. Steph says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    People that are thankful and grateful usually don’t make such a fuss about losing a few hours of sleep, birthday or not. Just a thought.

    • Adrienne says
      Posted June 26, 2015

      If you’re a mom you do! Trust me.

    • Tammy says
      Posted June 28, 2015

      Nor do they make ignorant blog comments criticizing someone else! Just a thought for you.

  156. Natalie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I can relate to your sentiment about being “annoyed to your core” with early wake ups. One of my twin boys likes to babble at 4am. Goodness knows why. Usually he goes back to sleep but didn’t the other day and woke up his brother at 5am. I was already so annoyed knowing that this was going to throw off the entire day. He did it again the next day, though this time he went back to sleep – but I couldn’t. So I finally got out of bed and just had some solitude and silence, two things I desperately needed. Cheers to you! You are a great example of authenticity, which so many mothers so desperately need.

  157. Sam M says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday, Kate!! I don’t have children of my own yet, but I still continually find myself learning that I have to be flexible and life doesn’t usually go the way I expected or wanted it to.God has used so many circumstances to remind me that my plan for my day isn’t the most important! Thanks for posting this! Hope you have a fabulous birthday with your men!

  158. Brooke says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Wow, I am so sorry Kate for all the ignorant comments you had come your way- on your birthday no less, when it already started off as a rough day. I know it must be hard to share personal details/feelings, especially when you are met with such cruel judgements about them. Your blog posts, like this one, really helps me put my problems in perspective and lets me know that I’m not the only one with hard moments. So I would like to thank you for continuing to share. You strike me as a very genuine, poised, and thankful person- don’t let the haters get you down! Happy Birthday!

  159. Leslie says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    hApPy BiRtHdAy Kate! Funny thing is I’m completely at the other side of the rainbow…menopause…but I too woke up up at 2am from a thunderstorm and was awoken again at 408 bc i was on fire with a hot flash on my neck and shoulders…no matter the age once you are an adult it’s never like it use to be…just learn to enjoy each moment for what it brings to you…and if no one else is telling you this, like your mom, than she’s truly lucky or she’s holding back…I can’t remember the last time I had decent sleep in 25 years…truly!

  160. Amber says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I can totally relate and feel your pain about sleep deprivation. Both my kids, 17 month old and 5 yo, didn’t sleep for more than 3 hour blocks until their first birthday. The first kid was rough, the second was almost intolerable. I mean, I didn’t know what else to do. I tried everything I could read about to get her to sleep longer. I was honestly getting very depressed that I could not see a light at the end of the tunnel. I had passed tired, I was chronically exhausted. It’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. It was a very dark place for me. Occasionally there are nights that are still bad when kids are sick or whatever, and it reminds me how bad it was for so long.
    Sorry for the long intro there…… What I mean is that I can see where you can be tired and grateful simultaneously. Being upset over the current situation and thankful for your family as a whole are NOT mutually exclusive. I loved my kids during that ordeal. But I was also very sad for not having the energy to enjoy it.
    Thanks for sharing your story. I felt so alone with a baby that wouldn’t sleep for so long. I still feel the sting of that feeling and my heart goes out to mamas who are still in that space. Even if it’s one night, or a few, or whatever, a kind hearted response is always called for.
    Take care.

  161. Kendra says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Thanks for sharing so honestly, Kate! I so needed this today. As a 36yo mother of a 3yo and a 10 week old, sometimes I think it’s my age that makes me not able to handle life with littles as I would like. But it’s just life! Your honesty gave me the encouragement I needed to make it through the day. And then I had more coffee.

    Happy birthday!

  162. Nilda says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    I comments this morning, but I just wanted to say I’m sorry for all the rude comments. I am a mom of a baby that still wakes up frequently but I still was able to relate to your post. I don’t think you’re ungrateful for your boys or your life, I think you had a perfectly human moment today and there’s nothing wrong with that!
    Hope you had a great birthday!

  163. Shalynn says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Kate, i want to apologize on behalf of the ignorant and rude people that have merely come to spread their misery. It’s so sad that some people feel the need to discourage and judge fellow moms. You are a terrific mom to your boys. By reading your other posts about your family it is evident how much you love them. Don’t be discouraged by the hurtful words of others as difficult as it may be. I hope your birthday took a turn for the better! Prayers and hugs sent your way! You’ve got this mama!

  164. Mary says
    Posted June 26, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate!!! May the Lord continue to bless you (and your family) each and everyday of your life.

  165. Lacey says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    First of all – Happy Birthday!!! I LOVE your blog & your videos! Next, as the mother of 2 boys who are 2 years & 9 months apart I appreciate your willingness to be honest about what you’re going thru. Of course someone is having a worse time than you – that’s life – but that doesn’t mean you should never feel like you can be honest about your feelings(on your own blog) because someone somewhere has it worse than you. As mothers, I feel like we can all relate to the hard times. Yes there are many, many great times but there are bad times too. Saying so doesn’t mean you love your children any less or don’t feel empathy for mothers who have a worse situation than your own. BUT I will say, now that my boys are 14 & 11 I would give anything to go back and hug those babies one more time. I’m in NO way judging you! I’m the first to say those sleepless nights are miserable! But I will say that one day believe it or not you will miss these times. Don’t let the Negative Nancy’s dissuade you from being totally honest about your journey. For every complainer there are multiple people who feel the same as you but just aren’t commenting. You are doing a great job!

  166. Kimberly says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    My 28th birthday was a bum one for me (wrote about it here: http://lavorandkimberly.blogspot.com/2012/03/you-cry-too-if-it-happened-to-you.html. And…Justin was the husband that got accepted to Duke ) I hope the day took a turn for the better and you ended it on a happier note. By the way, saw a chilled brand of coffee on “The Chew” this week and they raved about it. I’m not a coffee drinker but it might be something you’d enjoy! Can’t remember the name of it right this second but I’ll do some hunting and get back to ya!

  167. Megan C says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy birthday!! I’m right there with ya, it’s hard to not get upset when our expectations don’t go our way. I’m pretty sure it happens to me daily. I’m still struggling with that. This post was great though! I’m going to work harder at going with the flow.

  168. Julie K says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate! Since your birthday-day didn’t start out on a high note, you should celebrate your birthday-week.

    But please, please embrace your children, even when they’re the cause of your sleep deprivation. We’ve just miscarried with our first and very longed-for baby. What I wouldn’t give to wake up for a hungry baby…

    • Katie says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      Julie, I’m so sorry for your loss. That must be so hard. While I don’t think Kate intentionally does these posts complaining about the things that come with motherhood, I don’t think she has thought out the implications of what she is saying. There is no thought about how this post would make someone in your position. My 20 month old refused to nap without me holding him yesterday. I started to think about what I could be doing if I wasn’t having to hold him in order for him to sleep. Then I realized how blessed I am to have him and thanked God for the opportunity to hold my sleeping baby. Kate, you are somewhat of a public figure. People admire you and want to be like you, especially young girls. In a way you are a role model for some. People in your position have a greater responsibility to be careful with their words and actions. You say you are thankful, but, sadly, posts about your children say otherwise. Please think of women like Julie above when you want to complain. Think of how your boys would feel if they read these posts one day. Hopefully you have friends and family to vent to rather than use a public forum like this. And to all the women saying that all moms understand this…not true. This is what we signed up for. We should be thankful in everything. Things could be much worse. Just my 2 cents.

    • Jami says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      I am so very sorry for your loss, Julie. I hope you are surrounded by understanding and patient people as you navigate through your emotions. I have had multiple miscarriages and sadly know how difficult it is some days to even walk out my front door. I will pray you are blessed with a rainbow baby.

    • Kimberly says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      I think everyone needs to remember that Kate and Justin prayed for a baby for a LONG time before they were blessed with David. There’s not a doubt in my mind that she treasures every moment she has with those boys, and thanks Heavenly Father every day that they were given to her. Just because we have hard days, and gripe a little bit, doesn’t mean we aren’t appreciative of everything we’ve been given.

      • Jami says
        Posted June 27, 2015

        I’m positive she does appreciate her children, I never meant to imply she doesn’t. We’ve been trying for one baby for three years so my definition of a LONG time is different than yours. I was only trying to offer comfort to Julie. Julie’s heart is broken right now and a few kind words may just help her.

    • Julie K says
      Posted June 27, 2015

      I, in no way whatsoever, meant to imply that Kate and Justin are not grateful for God’s blessings on their lives. I did not intend to poo-poo on Kate’s birthday post, either. So Kate, I’m sorry I hijacked your post. Of course Kate, and every other mother, is human too, and I have no doubts that being a parent can be exhausting. I only wanted to say that some of us only wish, hope, and pray for the day that we can finally say that our biggest complaint of the day is having been awoken by the baby down the hall.

    • Leslie says
      Posted June 30, 2015

      I’m so sorry for your loss Julie. I have been there and these types of post would set me off or bring me to instant tears. I know God hears your cries for a baby. Trust that.

      Doesn’t matter which side of the coin you are on, God will use these struggles as a way to bring you loser to him. Neither one of my babies have had an easy road but I wouldn’t change them for the world. I now see God used my infertility pain AND is using my exhausted mother of littles for his glory. Hugs and prayers sent your way!

  169. Megan T says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy (belated) birthday, Kate! I have 2.5 year old and 6 month old girls, and have also been working on adjusting my daily expectations (to not really having any), and also praying for and practicing patience. It is a daily struggle, and thank you for being so honest in your posts. My husband and I were joking last week on Father’s Day, when it wasn’t 9am and the toddler had been in timeout twice, that children don’t observe holidays. At least toddlers and babies. And I guess that includes birthdays…I hope you had a great day 🙂

  170. Beth says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    I read your post on the exact day I cried about my 1 year old’s schedule. As a Type A personality, becoming a mom has challenged me to go with the flow, with mixed results. I loved what you said: “I’m continually working on being more flexible with my expectations, my plans, my day to day life. I don’t think that will be a trait that I’ll ever be able to fully embrace without making a conscious choice to do so.” YES.

    Have you read the book All Joy and No Fun? It touches on this– that our children bring us immeasurable amounts of bliss, but daily life is a beast.

  171. michelle says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy Belated Birthday!
    I wanted to encourage you! I sooooo know the feeling you have. I have five kids, and when my fourth was born it was a good night if I averaged getting up 4 or 5 times a night. I was tired, cranky, and my sisters wondered what happened to me. I was in survival mode.
    As moms, we all have bad days, but it is like what you said, it’s all attitude.
    God gives us children to mold us, to humble us, and to teach us to rely solely upon Him for our strength.
    So to all you moms who are having a hard time, pray for grace for the day! Let’s be a community that encourages each other in our hard times.
    I just taught this verse to my children, “A soft answer turneth away wrath” and “Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.” I hear them say it to each other. Or if they are fighting it is a gentle reminder to them how they should be behaving. Sometimes we as adults need this reminder as well.

  172. Marci says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    i hope you had a great birthday! I stumbled across your blog today looking at hair and I SO needed this. My littles are 16 months apart and I guess they both hate to sleep sometimes! You aren’t alone, and this was a great reminder for me as well. Cheers to flexibility and what matters most! <3

  173. Corrie says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy Birthday! I, too, will be 29 on Monday (the 29th!). My daughter will be five months exactly on that day as well and I hope she doesn’t play her “up at 3am and ready to start the day” like she sometimes does. How can I be mad at her beautiful smiling face?! Happiest baby ever and best thing I’ve ever done. Here’s to being 29!

  174. MomofLittles says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Happy birthday! Have you heard Francesca Battistelli’s “When the Crazy Kicks In”? I have been LOVING this song lately – so fun and catchy (my three year old sings right along! LOL) and it’s a sweet reminder to me of cherishing quiet moments and starting my day with the Lord before the crazy kicks in…because with 2 little ones, 19 months apart, the crazy kicks in fast! 🙂 Thankful to hear the boys went back to sleep for you and you had some quiet moments to start our this fantastic year!

  175. Jen says
    Posted June 27, 2015

    Man, do I feel you on the flexibility demanded of being a mother. It’s also a very difficult struggle point for me. I only work half time, but I still over plan my life outside of work and set my expectations too high too often. Thanks for being real and hope you had a very nice birthday:)

  176. Posted June 28, 2015

    Happy Belated birthday!

    I laughed when I read this because kids not waking up early is such a crucial thing that if I have to go to the bathroom after 5am I try to ignore it and go back to sleep because any movement in our room can awaken the brood! How sad is that?!

  177. Elisha B says
    Posted June 28, 2015

    Bless your heart. Been there. AM there! My little ones are all early risers. Raising my coffee cup! I TRY to use those early mornings to read the Bible, it helps get me out of the funk. Still, it’s hard!

  178. Heather says
    Posted June 28, 2015

    Happy birthday, Kate! I’m sorry you had a rough start to your birthday, but I hope you were able to celebrate it like you wanted because you’re a good mom and you deserve it!

    Also, I just wanted to say one of the reasons I love your blog is because of things like this. I see moms on blogs and Instragram like 7 months pregnant in stiletto heels looking perfect with their perfect houses and perfect spouses and perfect children…but that’s not reality! I love that your blog is 100% real and you’re not afraid to admit your struggles. Just remember that you named this blog “The Small Things blog” because we all need to just focus on the little things in our lives that make them worth living! You are beautiful, inside and out!

    Btw, my favorite part of this post was:

    “Well that was pretty much an enormous chore and I make the executive decision to just buy iced coffee drinks pre-made for crying out loud why are there coffee grinds everywhere.” bahaha! hopefully you’ll look back on this one day and laugh too 🙂

  179. Evelina says
    Posted June 28, 2015

    I hope the rest of your birthday weekend got better and there was a ittle bit more sleep for you. Happy 29th!

  180. Laura says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    Happy 29, Kate. The night before my 29th bday consisted of my colicky infant crying at the top of her lungs, me crying in my own bed, and my husband uttering the words, “Life, as we know it, is over.” I’m now 52, that infant is grown and thriving on her own, and I have nothing but smiles for that memory. When you’re in the midst of it, it seems like you’ve been parenting and struggling forever. But it’s really true what everyone says: Time flies and your children grow up so fast. It looks to me like you’re doing a great job of reminding yourself of your priorities and trying to stay flexible. Keep breathing, catch some rest when you can, and enjoy as much of the process as you can. You too will remember this time with fondness.

  181. Rachel says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    the biggest problem around our house is trying to get both girls to sleep at night! this was a funny post. very very much like what we deal with around here (2 girls age 3 and 1) and I just turned 30. and coffee is very important around here and we just started buying Starbucks Iced Coffee with Milk (glass bottles….4 pack) so we don’t have to deal!

  182. Susan says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    Dear Kate,
    First off I want to say thank you so much for taking the time to blog about motherhood, makeup, and all things hair! I have really learned a lot from the blog and I enjoy reading it. I really appreciate your post as you summed up what I feel often but don’t share. I am a mom of two young children and it was refreshing to hear your heart and the struggles. You have so humbly articulated how we all feel at times. Believe it or not your post WAS an encouragement because of your honesty about the hard moments you face. I have read earlier posts about your little one being colicky and I am sorry you are going through this. Your doing a great job! Happy belated birthday.

    Susan

  183. Cate says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    Thank you for sharing. I totally understand! You aren’t complaining. Sorry some folks took it that way. You’re human. My kiddo turned 1 last week and has only slept through the night 3-4 times, and not at all for at least the last 4 months. For the last 2 months she’s had what I would consider night terrors and only sleeps for 15 minutes to 2 hours in her crib without freaking out and even if you try to console her in her room she will continue to freak out for 5-6 hours. I finally gave up and will only fight with her for 15-20 minutes and then bring her to my bed to get her to calm down. Once she calms down, we just go back to sleep. I had no intentions of co-sleeping but it’s the only thing that will calm her night terrors. While we are hoping and praying they subside on their own, we are trying to get her to sleep in her bed by herself to start with and then moving her to our bed when she can’t stop freaking out. It’s heartbreaking to watch and exhausting for all of us. It’s ok to say that. It’s not complaining. It’s being real. Thank you for being real. I hope you had a wonderful birthday.

  184. Mindy says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    As a first time mom of an almost 11 month old little guy I feel you! I’ve been awakened often by dad for many reasons while he snoozes soundly 🙂 And my guy is an early riser so I FEEL you! I just wanted to say that your post touched me as I have a hard time not being able to control what happens in the day and expecting this or that and then it doesn’t happen. I also struggled and still do to some extent with the sleep deprivation. It hit me much harder than I expected and for me is one of the most difficult parts of parenthood. I don’t know if I can do it again to be honest. We will see. We moved 3-4 hours (without a baby in the car…then it’s much longer lol) from our families and just had our first baby free night ever for our anni this past weekend! It was the most awesome night of sleep ever! Maybe you can get a makeup birthday sleep soon! 😉 And as far as the iced coffee I am obsessed with the new Starbuck’s drinks at the grocery store. The skinny iced vanilla latte is my favorite! I like it more than the real thing from Starbuck’s!

  185. Colleen says
    Posted June 29, 2015

    YES!! I can so relate. My 2 year old has always been a terrible sleeper. My 4 month old actually sleeps better than my 2 year old. And I LOVE sleep. Some days are all about surviving until bed time. Hang in there!

    And really, people? Motherhood isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. Some days get off to a bad start. Moms should be allowed to vent without being criticized for it. Venting certainly does NOT mean you’re ungrateful or not thankful for what you have. It means you’re frustrated in a moment of time.

    I’ve been through 3 rounds of IVF to have my 2 boys. They were absolutely planned, prayed for, and wanted. They amaze me every single day. They are my everything. But you better believe that I’m not in the best mood when they’ve woken up multiple times at night and/or excruciatingly early. Get off your high horses already…

    • Colleen says
      Posted June 29, 2015

      And Happy Birthday, Kate! 🙂

  186. Leslie says
    Posted June 30, 2015

    My birthday fell right after Mother’s Day. Both of those days included baby and toddler vomit, no sleep and meltdowns. Did I mention no sleep? I have a baby Luke….sounds a bit like your Luke. WE DON’T SLEEP….for the love. All I want is sleep. BUT, God is so good to us, isn’t he? When I’m at my lowest, one of them WILL sleep or I will have a really, really good cup of coffee. Or a friend may email me something wonderful; or vainly I might just happen to have a killer hair day. The gifts are small and sometimes you have to search from them, but they are there. Oh, and to hopefully make you feel better, both my husband and I have been known to punch our pillows out of frustration when our baby Luke is up for the gazillionth time of the night. It helps, you should try it. :0)

  187. Kara says
    Posted July 1, 2015

    Happy Birthday Kate! I hope your day ended better than it started. June 26th is actually my birthday too, which I thought is cool because I have enjoyed reading your blog for some time now. I turned 26 this past Friday…Happy Belated! 🙂

  188. Gina says
    Posted July 4, 2015

    my heart brakes for the poster that just wants so badly to be a mom. That was me 30 years ago. I hope you can adopt.

    Also, these silly posts about tough days when they are little ones make me smile. Just wait till your little ones are teenagers!

  189. Cara S. says
    Posted July 9, 2015

    Kate–FIrst, Happy Birthday! It’s also mine too, although, I turned 34. I swear I could have written this post myself. My son, who’s not even 2, loves to randomly wake up between 4 and 5. I know exactly the “blood runs cold” feeling, as I have been there so many times too. Each time my kids wake up before I really want them to, I try so hard not to be annoyed, reminding myself that someday (maybe) I will miss this. I love your blog, keep being amazing.