Thoughts on transitioning from 2 to 3

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For Justin and I, the transition from 0 to 1 kid was much more dramatic than the transition from 1 to 2.

In fact, we were so ready to get started on expanding our family after having David that we started trying again for a second baby when David was only a few months old. Quite to our surprise, considering it took 14 months to get pregnant with David, I got pregnant pretty quickly the second time around. Luke and David are 14 months apart and I have to say I love that age gap for them. To be fair, I think whatever age gap they ended up having would work because, well, that’s just what our “normal” would be, but the 14 month thing has really worked well for us and them!

The timing on baby #3 was a bit more difficult to get on the same page about because we were further away from the baby stage, but I must admit I’m excited to only have one baby instead of a newborn and a 14 month old at the same time.

Only one baby in diapers?! Sign me up!

I really don’t know what to expect with this third baby, but I’m swinging pretty hard between wishing delivery day would just GET HERE ALREADY and savoring these last few weeks as a family of four. I think both boys are going to be big helpers for Justin and I, but Luke has proven to be much more interested in babies in the past. When friends have had babies, or even when we met my little nephew, Luke would immediately make a bee-line to the baby and want to hold him or her. He would offer his beloved “nigh nigh” (his blanket) and try to put a pacifier in the baby’s mouth. David would take a gander, but pretty quickly move on to toys or something else.

David, though, has started to put Luke down for nap time or bedtime and resists any assistance from me. He covers him up with his blanket, hangs an extra blanket over the side of his bed, and tells him the same phrase I say every time I put him down.

“Goodnight buddy, sleep good. Love you!”

David won’t even let me close the door, he must do it all! I’m excited to see what “jobs” David adopts as his own for this baby, and to see what Luke thinks of this whole change for the family.

Personally, I’ve really tried to set my focus on eliminating stressors so I can adjust from 2 to 3 with patience and grace. I like order, structure, and a schedule, and all 3 of those things are going to be more challenging for awhile. Prepping blog content and even making notes about easy meals to make so I don’t have to try to think of something to cook (that’s so much harder than the actual cooking to me!) are a few ways I’m trying to set myself up for an easier transition.

Mostly, I’m just so ready to meet this baby and find out whether I have a daughter or another son and soak up the gift that is a newborn baby.

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Comments (37)

  1. Posted May 4, 2018

    I’m sure you’ll adjust well! Can’t wait for the new baby to join your beautiful family! 🙂

    Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
    http://charmainenyw.com

  2. Kelly Stokes says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Hi there!! I have three kiddos and just wanted to tell you my experience. Having my first two was super hard. For different reasons, though. The first baby turned my world upside down. My second one was hard because I also had a toddler, who was super difficult after the baby was born.
    BUT, with my third baby, it was super easy!! (As easy as having a newborn baby can be, anyway…) The experience with my third, from delivery to bringing my newborn home and the first few weeks, just felt so much smoother. I didn’t feel like my life was turned upside down. Maybe because of my experience. I felt so much more at peace and it just flowed.
    Praying it’s the same for you!! Praying that you feel the same joy and peace that I did!!

    • Kate says
      Posted May 4, 2018

      That is encouraging Kelly! Thank you!

  3. Chelsea says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    God has gifted you with the size family he intends for you. Justin and you (& your children) will adjust fabulously so long as you stay fixated on patience and having grace through the transition. I’m so excited to see your family grow- you are ever inspiring to me and love your blog!

    • Kate says
      Posted May 4, 2018

      Thanks Chelsea!

  4. Charmain says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    My boys were 3 and 4 years old when their baby sister came along. They are 13, 12 and almost 9 years old now. I like routine and structure as well and the first 6 months was tough… I must admit… even though I enjoyed having my first baby girl in my arms – I almost didn’t make it through the first months! It felt very much like chaos and I hate chaos! But you do eventually get into a routine and you sleep better and everything falls back into place… just hang in there, take it day by day and enjoy your new baby!

  5. Kara says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Reading this in the early stages of labor, waiting for our #3 to arrive. My 2 & 4 year olds are opposite your boys as far as interest in babies are concerned. My oldest is all about taking care of babies and my 2 year old is mostly interested in all the new equipment that babies come with. Bless you all during your delivery!!

  6. Allie says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Good luck getting everything in order this last few weeks. You’re in my thoughts and prayers! Happy Friday, xAllie
    http://www.theallthatglittersblog.com

  7. Veronica says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    We just added baby #3 in March and have an almost 4 year old and almost 2 year old (so somewhat similar to your family) and the hardest thing for me has been crying. I feel like one (or more) of the 3 kids is always crying. Especially our son, the newly middle child, who previously was not much of a cryer, will lose it over practically nothing…fingers crossed it’s just an adjusting phase! I’ve had to remember to stop, pray, and breathe when I’m getting frustrated so I don’t lash out in anger. And more than once I’ve had to ask my oldest for forgiveness for being grouchy towards her when I’ve been frustrated. Motherhood is a humbling journey. Thank you for sharing your journey with all of us! Praying for a safe delivery of your little bundle of joy!

  8. Lauren says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    So happy for you + your family!! 🙂

    xx,
    Lauren

    http://www.theseasideprep.wordpress.com

  9. Emily says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    I’ve been following your blog since before David was born and it has been so fun to watch you and Justin to from a couple to a soon to be family of 5! My husband and I had pur first child 10 weeks ago and I love reading your posts about motherhood so much more now that I’m a mom too! Also, we didn’t find out the gender ahead or time and absolutely loved the surprise. Enjoy you last few moments of pregnancy!

  10. Kathi says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    We have 4 boys and found that after you adjust to 2 the others are pretty easy to add to the routine. I always prepped a few meals to have in the freezer that were a mix of just have to heat it up, throw it in the slow cooker, or put it in the oven to bake. I found it helpful to have a two-week plan of dinners as a start, knowing that if the day went south, I could easily move to an easier option. As the boys got older and more involved in activities, having a monthly dinner plan became more important. Recently, I have found Once a Month Meals which makes my prepping and planning even easier. You have got this and will adjust with grace and ease.

  11. Noelle says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Excited for your family as you make the transition to 3! We just had our 3rd child 3 weeks ago and I feel like it’s been our easiest transition yet. My boys are 4 and 2.5 and we added a sister to the family and they are over the moon excited about her. And I’ll say my 3rd c-section was also my easiest recovery too. Thinking about you guys as you get closer to delivery day!

  12. AM says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Thanks for sharing, we’ve got 2 girls 2.5 years apart and are at a point where we are thinking about when to start trying for #3. I worry about the girls and how they’d adjust, but your post reminds me that they’ll find ways to help and love another baby just like they do with each other. Best of luck to you in the coming weeks! I can’t wait to hear more about the transition from 2 to 3.

  13. Diane says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Best wishes for a routine C-section, and a speedy recovery! It is so lovely to hear how caring your boys are with each other and other babies! They are blessed with sweet temperaments, and I’m sure it helps to have great parents to nudge them in the right direction. Looking forward to hearing your big announcement when the baby arrives: boy or girl!

  14. Krissy says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Best of luck with your transition to three kiddos! I read your blog everday, so it feels like I know you – and since I am pregnant with #2 arriving in August, it’s been fun to have your pregnancy posts during this time! Hope all goes well with the birth, I’m sure your boys will love having a new baby in the family!

  15. Jenna says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    I’ve always heard that the transition from 2-3 is harder than from 1-2. Let us know if you think the same! Our girls are 4 years apart, because we could legit not imagine having another baby any sooner than that. Babies are hard! Our 3 month old is a DREAM though. She’s content 95% of the time, plays on her playmat if I need to put her down for a second, and sleeps.through.the.night. If I’d known she would be so easy (compared to her sister, who was NOT), then maybe we would’ve had a second baby sooner! 🤣 Can’t wait to meet your new daughter or son! I still vote girl, and Emily as the name.

  16. Angela says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    You sound super organized and ready for the change! I found going from one to two so stressful since my oldest isn’t the.most cooperative.
    Your oldest sounds so helpful! Good luck with baby!

    http://www.BlushandPearls.com

  17. Marilou says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    It’s difficult to know what it will be like for you on having a third baby join your family but I’m pretty sure you will do just fine! I’ve been following you for awhile now, and you sure seem to have life figured out! Happy marriage, two sweet little boys and a positive look at life in every way and at every turn. You’ll be just fine with the adjustment…..but remember it’s life, and as you know life happens but that’s okay! Just go with the flow and do your best!

  18. Christina says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Granted I only see through social media but you seem to have a good handle in things. I think you will be great with three but also know it’s perfectly OK to not be OK at it too. Simplify will be a key word if you feel overwhelmed. Some days all you will be able to do is keep the kids fed and that’s OK. Good luck. I can’t wait for the gender reveal!

  19. Jennifer says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    I’m so excited for you! The day is getting super close. I can’t wait to find out if you’re having a boy or girl. I loved your insta story the other day. I laughed out loud at your apple story. I love “catching up” with you on there. Love your product recommendations as well. I always do research on your blog before an Ulta trip. Its the closest I can get to having you go with me and tell me what will work for my hair!

  20. KB says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    FWIW, I thought the Transition from 2 to 3 was the easiest. Like y’all, We had 1 and 2 super close together. They were a bit older when number three came along. I felt like I really got to enjoy baby number 3 because the older two didn’t require so much hands-on work but also because I was relaxed and finally felt like I knew what I was doing with a baby. It’s also really fun to have kids old enough to enjoy their baby sibling.

    Hoping you have a similar experience. So excited for y’all!

  21. Lily says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    When is your due date? I know you’ve probably said it a million times but I keep checking the blogging wondering if today is the today!!! 💙or💟? can’t wait to find out!

  22. Posted May 4, 2018

    I love this! How fun that you are being surprised! haha. I couldn’t do it! Waiting until 20 weeks was hard enough! Also I LOVE that dress. It didn’t fit me well when I tried it on and I was so sad! You look absolutely adorable in it!!

  23. Amanda Butler says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    I havent transitioned from 2 to 3 yet, but my babies were very close together….just over a year! Due to medical reasons, I had to have a scheduled C-section 2nd time around.
    I knew I wouldnt be up to preping and cooking dinners for a while, and didnt want that burden to fall squarely on hubby’s shoulders, so I decided to make freezer meals. My mom and i put together a total of 47 dinners (all large enough for leftovers for lunch the next day, so it was really more meals than the 47) in one afternoon. Some were casseroles, some crockpot dump meals, some needed pasta or tortillas & veggies (for tacos) added, but it was basically all dump in the crockpot, stick right in the oven meals. I even made a breakfast burritos for hubby to grab as he headed out the door for his breakfast. It made a huge diffrence! Between the few meals some friends brought over, the night hubby grabbed pizza or KFC, and the freezer meals, I had dinners for three months! I got to focus on my new baby and recovery rather than “what to make for dinner”. I did this while 38 weeks pregnant…it was a good distraction!

    • Allie says
      Posted May 4, 2018

      I sure would love to know what all you pulled together! I’d love to do this. Do you have it documented anywhere?

  24. Posted May 4, 2018

    As a mom of 4 boys, ranging in age from 9 years old to 6 months old, I think each transition brings its own challenges! Going from 1 to 2 was really hard for us, but then from 2 to 3 had its own struggles with being “outnumbered”. When we had baby boy#4 six months ago, it was challenging in a whole new way! But it was awesome because our 2 oldest were, and still are, amazing big brothers and terrific helpers.

    Part of the sweetness of adding to our family is observing and experiencing sibling bonding.

    Good luck, you will do great! Your sweet family is so blessed. 🙂

  25. Heather says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Going from 2 to 3 was the easiest and most fun transition for us! The first baby was about the biggest life change imaginable, going from no kids to one. The second was difficult bc I felt like I couldn’t manage everything a newborn and two year old needed. By the time the 3rd came along I KNEW I could manage and that the crazy exhausting newborn time was fleeting. I truly enjoyed the 3rd newborn phase… and now in a blink she’s FOUR! We had 2 boys close together (2 years apart) and our third was a girl when my boys were 3 and 5.

  26. Allie says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    Would love to know what you’ve come up with for Meal Plans! I am prepping for baby boy #2 who will be also be 14 months younger than our first! Also, I am sure you are already a pro on baby scheduling, but I loved the Mom’s On Call book and set of schedules. So easy to follow and our son adapted to it so easily. Best wishes!

    • Allie says
      Posted May 4, 2018

      Just to add about Mom’s On Call- he was sleeping through the night (12 hours) around 10 weeks. It was great for all of us to get rest and preserve sanity!

  27. Mackenzie says
    Posted May 4, 2018

    I’m very excited for you to add to your family. I have 3 biological children. My hardest transition was from 2 to 3. It was just being outnumbered and life just got extremely chaotic with kids at different stages in life. Everyone has a different life though and handles things differently. I worked outside of the home full-time and was also enrolled in grad school at the time. We have all survived because they are now almost 14, 10.5 and just 7. I wish you the very best.

  28. Ash says
    Posted May 5, 2018

    Beautiful Kate, wishing you all the best 💗

  29. Sarah says
    Posted May 6, 2018

    It’s always so fascinating to read other people’s experiences. Each child and family Dynamic is so different and you never know how it will go until it happens! My two girls were three and a half and 20 months when we added my son to the mix. For me, going from 2 to 3 was just as hard or harder as 0 to 1. The 1-2 transition didn’t bother me at all. It just felt impossible to keep everyone happy so the mom guilt came on strong. However, my middle was potty training so that was demanding while trying to nurse, etc. The good news is no matter how good or bad, you will always sink into a new normal! And both my girls absolutely adored their brother. It’s all worth it!

  30. Posted May 8, 2018

    I have two now, 25 months apart, and can´t imagine having a newborn again. Maybe bcause they are still so small that at least my son needs my full attention, but mostly because I think with two I have reached my happy number.

    Anne|Linda, Libra, Loca

  31. Susan says
    Posted May 19, 2018

    Sounds so sweet. My tip would be to say the baby has to wait, when she is fussy etc. I would sort of exaggerate that so my two girls didn’t get jealous of their baby brother. And have an activity bag for only when the baby is feeding with new crafts and toys. God bless